replacing fomo with jomo
I’m sure most of you have heard the term FOMO (fear of missing out). It’s that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you think you might be missing out on something or the thought that others are having more fun than you. It’s fuelled by social media where everyone’s highlight reels can make your everyday life feel, by comparison, a little lack luster. JOMO, or the joy of missing out, is about finding joy and happiness in your own life without feeling the need to compare or to be ‘tuned in’ to the next exciting invitation on the horizon.
Here are a few ways I try to cultivate more JOMO in my life:
1.) Limit my digital consumption: I set a goal earlier this year to set specific times of the day to check my phone, email, voicemail, and social media accounts. This limits the amount of time you are spending aimlessly scrolling online for “just a few minutes”. If you find yourself comparing yourself to others on social media, consider doing an audit of accounts you currently follow. How do they make you feel? Are you inspired or left feeling bad about yourself? If the latter, consider unfollowing, muting or blocking. Digital detoxes can also be helpful as they allow you to avoid the comparison merry-go-round. I, personally, have found that the more time I practice spending time offline the less likely I crave jumping back onto social media.
2.) Engaging in Mindfulness: Mindfulness is about focusing on the present moment; not ruminating about the past or thinking too far ahead into the future and worrying about all the things you don’t yet have or have missed out on. Even if you only have a few minutes to spare in your day, consider adding a mindfulness practice to your routine.
3.) Practicing Gratitude: Shift the focus from what you’re missing out on to what you have in your life. Remind yourself that the person you are and the things you have in your life are the very things others are wishing they had in theirs.
4.) Being in Nature: Nature is real life, not social media life. Connecting with nature can be a very grounding experience and can deepen our relationship with the world around us and, if we are in nature with others, it can also deepen our relationships with our loved ones. Spending time outdoors keeps you offline, too, as long as you leave your phone at home!
5.) Replace “should” with “want”: A driver of FOMO is the constant pressure to always be tuned in and to say yes to everything. We may feel a sense of responsibility to be available to others, or we say yes to everything out of fear that missing out will lead to regret or missed opportunities. This only leads to heightened unhappiness, burnout and resentment. The next time you receive an invitation to participate in something, consider whether the event aligns with your personal interests, values and well-being. If it does and you have the mental, physical and emotional capacity to engage in it, perhaps that is a sign to say ‘yes’. Otherwise, consider implementing boundaries. There is power in saying ‘no’ (see my Wednesday Wellness Tip on this!). Remember, if it’s not a heck yes, it’s a heck no!
How do you implement more JOMO in your life?
~Kate
